38 Year Old Experiencing Mid Life Crisis! Any Donations Will Be Appreciated.

Memo

July 8, 2008

To all employees,

Here at New Revolution Ventures, we pride ourselves on our new Special High Intensity
Training (S.H.I.T) program. In fact, we pride ourselves on the amount of S.H.I.T we provide to
all our employees. Our philosophy is that if we give our employees more S.H.I.T than any other
firm, we will soon be the leader in our industry. We also believe that the S.H.I.T we give our
employees will then carry over to our clients, in the hopes that our employees will give more
S.H.I.T to our clients, thereby, hoping for a happier, more satisfied client. We are also calculating that our clients will value the S.H.I.T we give them on a daily basis.

We are so confident in our S.H.I.T program, that for our outstanding employees, a new bonus has been implimented. This will go to the employees who proactively go out of their way to give more S.H.I.T to other employees than any other person.

If, at any point, you feel you have not received enough S.H.I.T for the month, please contact a staff member and they will ensure you are given more S.H.I.T.

We are also initiating a new work place relaxation policy known as Superior Constant Relaxing
& Energizing Work Environment De-stress (S.C.R.E.W.E.D). Here at New Revolution Ventures,
we want our employees to feel as S.C.R.E.W.E.D as possible, we believe that a S.C.R.E.W.E.D
employee is a happy employee. To this end, we will make sure all our employees feel S.C.R.E.W.E.D at all times.

If you are not feeling particularly S.C.R.E.W.E.D at any point, please make sure you attend the
S.H.I.T meeting so we can make sure you are feeling S.C.R.E.W.E.D at all times.

We have a new billing and accounting procedure in place, its now known as Restored Account
Priority Escalation (R.A.P.E). This is to provide a speedier resolution to all of our clients billing issues.

We are now required to R.A.P.E each of our clients bank accounts. By performing a R.A.P.E of
each of our clients bank accounts every time they call with billing issues this will actually help us become a more profitable company.

We are presently restructuring our management titles and duties. Your supervisor is now much
more than just a supervisor, they will now be known as Business Account Supervisors Tasked
At Relaying Data (B.A.S.T.A.R.D). All personel and job related issues will now be brought to the B.A.S.T.A.R.D on duty.

If you feel you are not feeling S.C.R.E.W.E.D at work, please consult the B.A.S.T.A.R.D on
duty. The B.A.S.T.A.R.D will make sure you receive more S.H.I.T to ensure you are feeling S.C.R.E.W.E.D at all times while working for New Revolution Ventures.

We are excited to impliment these new changes, and we hope you will find your employment here highly rewarding.

Sincerely,

Daniel Muhlestein

Head B.A.S.T.A.R.D